Archive for the ‘DIY’ Category

MINI FURNITURE

Sunday, November 6th, 2011

I’m nothing if not obsessive, ridiculously self-critical and weirdly competitive with that cheapskate thing layered in for extra fun. Not a great combo for basic stuff like a sense of contentment or feelings of ease and satisfaction. Unfortunately, I’ve been having trouble finding modern miniature stuff on my thrifty routes and thought that instead of buying a bunch of super pricey premade mini furniture that wasn’t quite right for my Dollhouse Challenge, why not just build everything from scratch? Which is probably crazy person thinking.

Especially considering that CERTAIN people do micro better.

So, all my art school tools got dusted off and the local craft store hit up for all that craft wood, felt and leather scraps usually only encountered in my darkest nightmares. Of course, now there is a giant mess in the dining room from experimenting with materials and substandard construction methods, because I learn mainly through failure. Screw research.

Wait, what am I going to do with all this mini stuff when this is over?

Great.

Let’s not think about the future. Let’s look at that mini gray sofa instead. LOOK. It’s made of felt and basswood and tears.

Or look! After only three failed attempts I built a leather sling chair and ottoman…which probably needs to be tweaked and remade to address a few problems. But it’s fine for now? Or until my self-critical crazy brain wins and forces a rebuild.

Hey, a bench.

Yeah dude, I totally hand cut and sculpted those balsa wood legs like a pro. Totally mitered the crap out of the corners and slammed a craft store birch plywood veneer on top.

That’s how I roll.

Worked so nice I did it twice. With a coffee table.

This chunky mini dining table is made from a 99¢ “mosaic plaque wood blank” with four pieces of balsa slapped on for legs. Less than 10 minutes and $1.50 to build.

BOOM. Done.

Check out my “credenza” that doesn’t open or store anything. It’s all an illusion, except for the brass legs. Those are real brass.

This reminds me that at some point I need to decide on finishes (stains? oil? paint?) for all this sad crafty birch-colored wood. Maybe I should upgrade to nicer woods? Oh, but that sounds like it requires some effort and more money…so nope.

Boom. Another bench? Shut up. I like building benches.

And yes this is “upholstered” in fine leather (which means I glued scrap leather to balsa wood). Luxurious.

Right after I photographed my mini sling chair I dropped it and boom, looks like my patented “throw more glue on it” method of construction didn’t hold up so well.

Luckily, since I’m a genius, I knew to throw more glue on it and now it’s like it never happened. Except for all the visible glue.

Speaking of, I’ve become pretty glue reliant. Why do things right when you can glue your problems away? It’s too bad glue looks sloppy on fabric (as demonstrated via my pillow experiments), so still looking to resolve the mini textile issue…but I despise sewing. HOW CAN ONE PERSON FACE SUCH ADVERSITY?

BTW, this headboard / sloped ceiling / bed frame conundrum still requires solutions. Among many other things…

Things in context. Glorious.

I’ve neglected to finish building the a-frame structure or decide on it’s finer details since finishing stuff or focusing on doing one thing at a time is for suckers. Chaos is way cooler.

OK. Only a million more mini things to do.

*BTW – if you enjoy mini stuff (or dogs), check out & follow thebrickhouse : instagram feed. Expect an overabundance of terrible shots of my mini experiments & the chihuahuas (or liquor & food).

FIREPLACE

Tuesday, September 13th, 2011

A little while back Laure and I went through her storage and pulled out a few portfolios filled with large scale photos she had taken during art school. We framed one great landscape for her bedroom and it looked so crazy amazing that she graciously let me borrow this softly colored desk shot so I could have a big ‘ol framed photo as well.

I hung it and looked at it and then texted her a picture of everything installed.

While it’s a great piece, we both agreed that it was being completely overpowered by the fireplace. Off to another spot with you!

The area above the fireplace has been an ongoing struggle, with many unsatisfactory incarnations including these – HEREHERE HERE.

The problem is scale.

Our ceilings are a standard 8′ tall, but the fireplace rides pretty high on the wall allowing for a mere 37″ of white space above the mantel. Two thin windows flank the fireplace on either side and their top moldings create a weird invisible horizontal line across the wall. When anything hangs near or above this strange visual trickery the ceiling begins to feel really low, while conversely, the art appears to be hung way too high.

Then there’s that mantel.

Blech.

Overly fussy and completely under-scaled, this has been one of those “I’ll get to it projects” that never seemed to be gotten to. All I’ve ever imagined doing was installing a simple but chunkier wood mantel over the top of this thing. Something boxy, something easy to build, something budget friendly.

Excuse my terrible photoshopping, but a solution as simple as this uncomplicated wood box would be better scaled and suited for the fireplace mantle, easily constructed and pretty cheap materials-wise.

Screw it. Why not go all change crazy and paint the brick a lighter color like a soft gray/almost white. Or go slightly less nuttier and paint the thing a true black.

(I’m leaning lighter – if for no other reason than to shake things up)

Over the mantle art-wise is still an issue. I’ve hunted for the perfect long and lean piece to snuggle up into that strangely proportioned spot and have come up with ZERO things after almost four years of searching. Time to DIY.

Surprise surprise. I can’t afford a Stella or a Judd or any blue chippy art. I mean, I wish I could – that would be INCREDIBLE – but I can’t even find an affordable no-name modernist abstract painting or mid century fiber art wall hanging, let alone ANYTHING that’s both famous and super long and lean.

Making some fauxart has long been a noodle in my brain (and something I have done before). Why not. Faking it is fun.

I’ve been mocking up a few different (easily made) options – but SHOCKER – this long/thin composition isn’t widely popular with artists whose work I dig. Or really any artists. ‘Cause it’s weird.

Firstly, a fake Ed Ruscha, well actually it’s from his art book THEN & NOW. I don’t know, it’s not a favorite – I just always liked that project and this typography. Plus this would be so easy to make.

Next idea was a fake Matthew Brannon. I always liked his larger scale installations – like the Whitney limply coiled eel, a reoccurring motif in his work. It’s the right scale and I love an eel.

Otherwise, most of the artist’s work that I love looks awkward as hell squished into a format like this or is too labor intensive for my quick and dirty faker style. I though I could pretty easily pull-off something text based like a Weiner or a Holzer or a Shrigley or a Nauman or even a Baldessari – but nothing felt quite right (even though I love me some Weiner).

I’ll always remember this story a teacher once told me about going to another rather famous artists studio. He was admiring all the Jasper Johns and Warhols (or things equally blue chippy) and asked about the pieces. “Oh those? They’re all fakes – I just made them. Come on, I can’t afford that shit.”

Mantel first, forgery later, methinks.

FAUXDENZA

Friday, August 19th, 2011

BOOM.

It’s mother-effing fauxdenza* time.

We could flashback to the rough beginning of this particular fauxdenza via the power of HYPERLINKS or maybe just scroll down for a refresher.

OK. Let’s get our DIY on.

* Trademark via Anna at D16 & blatantly used here ad nauseum.

 

FAUXDENZA

Dimensions: 10′ long x 13-1/2″ deep x 33″ tall

Materials:

Ikea

8  –  Applad Doors (15 x 18″)
4  –  Akurum Wall Cabinets (30 x 18″)
8  –  Integral Hinge (2 pack)
2  –  Akurum Suspension Rail

Lumber

1  –  Wood  (14′ L x 15″W x 1″T) *I used Afrormosia

Tools:

Drill
Circular saw
Level
Tape Measure
Ratchet
Screws + appropriate anchors
Shims
Steel Wool
Fine Sandpaper
Danish Oil
Feed n’ Wax
Clean Rags

This poor, strange living room wall…

There was once a pipe shelf. Then I got bored with that. Then nothing for a bit. Then a floating storage credenza sounded good. Yup. Fauxdenza.

The whole fauxdenza thing boils down to just installing Ikea kitchen cabinets way, way too low. Since the tops of the wall cabinets aren’t meant to ever be seen and are all uglified, making some sort of aesthetically pleasing top becomes necessary. But first, installation.

The Akurum suspension rail system is designed to levely hang Akurum wall cabinets very simply. Of course, to install the rail you have to choose appropriate wall fasteners for your walls. For our plaster walls, screws into studs plus heavy duty anchors worked perfectly.

I test mounted the cabinets to see what the plumb/level situation was going to be when confronted with our old plaster walls.

Obvious shocker. Old plaster walls are really uneven.

The walls are wonky, but the other installation hurdle was that creepy giant non-functioning heater thing. Not only did it ugly up  the place, it’s location blocked the centered installation of the loooonnng fauxdenza.

So we removed the internal bits, framed out the wall, patched and painted it up (although, finding matching molding and large floor grates are still an issue).

Old house + plaster walls = Gappity gap gap

The last cabinet had a pretty large gap since the plaster wall took a sudden curve.

To correct the gap, first we shimmed the rail with some broken paint sticks from Home Depot, because that’s how we roll (unprofessionally). It was clear that the initial shim was nowhere near deep enough. We tested out how deep it had to be by sticking those little furniture foot pads onto the rail (unprofessionally).

Turns out, the last cabinet needed over an inch of the wackiest shimming you’ll never, ever see.

With the extreme shimming resolved and stuff hanging level, hiding the enormous new shim gap was the next quandary. The simple wood top I had planned on installing had to continue and wrap around the sides of the cabinets to disguise the monstrous shim gap.

For the newly expanded wood wrap, it felt best to find a better grade hardwood than I could grab at Home Depot.

With some brief googles I found Peterman Lumber, a local mill/lumber yard that specializes in domestic and exotic woods. They have wood wood, you know, wood you take seriously. Wood that won’t take crap from no one, no how.

Tight budget in mind, I settled on a 14 foot long piece of Afrormosia, which is an excellent and – cough* cough* – cheaper teak substitute. Fauxteak.

At about 15 inches wide by an inch thick, the piece I picked ran about $100 and looked purtty.

We used a handheld circular saw to cut the wood down to size. No fancy woodworking, no miters. Just simple straight lines.

I traced along the front edge of the cabinet door onto the wood sitting on top of the cabinets and pressed flush against the wall. No brainer, no craziness. Cut on the traced line for a superb custom fit.

Each joint, as well as the edges, got a quick sanding to knock down any unevenness and smooth things out.

The rest of the wood got prepped with a once over sanding using super fine steel wool. Pretty much, I went with the same process that I use to restore vintage furniture to treat this new wood. Slap on a few coats of Danish oil and a few coats of Feed n’ Wax and…

Bam.

That untreated wood darkens up and looks incredible.

To attach the wood, I predrilled a few holes through the inside of the cabinet frames and screwed into the bottom of the wood to secure it; of course, do not go through it completely. It only takes a few strategic screws to set the wood solidly in place, all fancy looking.

Initially, I had planned on using the Ikea Strecket handles and tested them out a bunch during the cabinet installation. Once the wood went on though, the handles suddenly looked way too fussy and got nixed.

Having no handles on the doors has been fine. The cabinets are high enough that I can comfortably grab the bottom door edge to open things up without any awkwardness.

Done and done.

For about $300, some labor and some problem solving, we custom-built a ten foot long floating credenza that adds tons of storage while being perfectly scaled and custom fit on an awkwardly long and barren entryway wall.

Being both super customizable and easily constructed, the fauxdenza seems a clever DIY solution for a wide spectrum of storage conundrums. Plus it looks sexy doing it, which never hurts.